When It Rains...It Pours

I have to begin this blog entry by warning you that it has nothing to do with marketing. This time of year brings such mixed emotions for me. I met and then married my husband during the Fall and both of my children were born during this time of year. But I also have had some brutal times during one Oct/Nov time period two years ago. My Mom started having concerns that this black cloud that had settled overhead would never move away.

First my father was diagnosed with an aggressive form of prostate cancer. His day of surgery his heart went into A-Fib and the surgery was cancelled. He needed to have extensive testing completed to make sure he would be fit for surgery.

In the meantime.....one of my dear friend's father died after a long battle with a botched surgery. I planned to attend his service the following day when I received a phone call from my father that his father (my PopPop) was found unresponsive at his home. I rushed to the hospital to find out that he was found dead by the medics but was brought back to life and then rushed to the hospital. I was able to get pertinent information from the doctors to relay back to my father concerning my PopPop's diagnosis: Vegetative state. By this time my father's heart condition was regulated and his planned surgery was delayed again so we could concentrate on my grandfather.

So...instead of having his cancer removed my father had to deal losing his father. I have to say that I was the emotional strong one when dealing with the complicated task of helping someone off the last remnants of life support. We had multiple neurosurgeons consult with us and confirm our worst fears. My PopPop would never be coming back. He was barely hanging on and his tests showed no brain activity. We then as a family had to follow his living will by removing all life support.

Somewhere during the three days of living at the hospital we all tried our best to be strong and deal with the emotional task at hand. We not only had to remove his feeding tube, breathing support but also bring in a medical tech to turn off his defibrillator/pacemaker. Even after observing all of his wishes it took another day for him to pass.

One week after my grandfather's funeral I was back in the hospital supporting my mom and then help care for my father after his prostate surgery. I am happy to report that for now my father has remained in remission regarding his prostate surgery.

As I grow older and I have more life to reflect upon I notice that times of crisis seem to rear their ugly head during extremely positive moments. I almost fear success or happiness because I have always been rewarded with something so ugly.. so sad that it is hard to recover from. For example: When my son was born my husband and I joyfully celebrated this beautiful little boy. By the time my son was six months old, my husband's father had died unexpectedly and his mother would be rushed into emergency bypass surgery after being brought back from the dead twice. Flash forward four years. My daughter is born and within one month my son is misdiagnosed with a fatal kidney disease and my mom has a grand Mal seizure caused by dehydration brought on by a severe flu. She is left in paralyzed state for a week and doctors are unsure if she will ever be the same again.

I wish that I could enjoy the good in life more and not worry so much about what is around the corner. The one thing that keeps me going is to know that the result of these traumatic events don't always end in negatives. My son was able to pull out of his health problem and my mom recovered completely from her illness. The lesson I keep learning from the visits from the dark cloud is that there is hope and the possibility of a positive outcome.... and I guess that is a good lesson to be learning!